Vendors - Neglect Them at Your Peril

When we think about the most important relationships in business and life, our minds often go straight to clients, prospects, team members, or family. These are the people we consciously prioritize and nurture. Yet, there is another category of contact, often overlooked, sometimes dismissed, that plays a critical role in our success: vendors.

Vendors are the purveyors of goods and services who keep our businesses running. In the consumer world, they are the servers in restaurants, hotel staff, salesclerks, delivery drivers, and countless others. In the professional sphere, they are the suppliers, contractors, consultants, and service providers who enable us to deliver value to our own clients.

Too often, we reduce vendors to their function. We justify, consciously or subconsciously that, because they are “working for us,” they don’t require (deserve?) the same respect, attention, or care we extend to other relationships. This mindset is not only ethically questionable, but also strategically short-sighted.

The Self-Fulfilling Quality of Interaction

Early in my career, I failed to recognize vendors as deserving of the same level of attention and respect as family, friends, clients, prospects, and team members. I treated them transactionally, expecting quality service without offering quality engagement. Unsurprisingly, I often struggled to receive the level of service and attention I sought.

What I didn’t realize at the time was the self-fulfilling nature of my interactions. When I treated vendors as mere functionaries, they responded in kind, delivering the minimum required; rarely going above and beyond. When I began to apply the distinctions of The Persuasion Blueprint, Caring, Connection, and Collaboration, the dynamic shifted dramatically.

Caring: Recognizing Humanity Beyond the Transaction

Caring begins with the simple act of recognizing vendors as human beings with aspirations and challenges of their own. It means moving beyond the transactional mindset and acknowledging that their role is not their identity.

For example, consider the hotel staff member who checks you in after a long flight. If you treat them as a cog in the hospitality machine, you’ll likely receive perfunctory service. But if you engage with genuine care—asking how their day is going, expressing gratitude for their assistance—you create a moment of human connection. That moment often translates into better service, more attentiveness, and sometimes even unexpected generosity. 

Caring is not manipulation. It is respect. And respect, when consistently practiced, builds a reservoir of goodwill that pays dividends in both business and life.

Connection: Building Rapport That Transcends Roles

Connection is the bridge between caring and collaboration. It involves finding common ground, mirroring language, and listening actively. Vendors, like anyone else, want to feel heard and valued.

I recall a time when a vendor representative followed up after a negative experience I had with their AI-based communication tool. Rather than getting defensive, he thanked me for my feedback, asked clarifying questions, and mirrored my language. He labeled my emotions and provided a detailed follow-up email addressing my concerns. Because of this, I felt truly heard. The relationship transformed from a transactional exchange into a collaborative partnership.

Connection doesn’t require grand gestures. It requires presence. It asks that we slow down, listen, and engage authentically.

Collaboration: Co-Creating Solutions Instead of Imposing Them

Collaboration is the highest expression of respect in vendor relationships. It means inviting vendors into the process of problem-solving rather than imposing “canned” solutions.

When vendors feel like partners rather than subordinates, they bring creativity, initiative, and commitment to the table. They are more likely to anticipate needs, resolve issues proactively, and invest in the relationship.

Collaboration turns service providers into allies. It transforms transactions into partnerships. And it creates a virtuous cycle where both parties benefit from the shared success.

The Dividends of Vendor Respect

Treating vendors with caring, connection, and collaboration is not just the right thing to do; it is also the smart thing to do. The dividends are tangible:

• Better service quality: Vendors who feel respected are more motivated to deliver excellence.

• Stronger loyalty: Vendors who experience genuine connection are less likely to cut corners or disengage.

• Greater innovation: Collaborative relationships invite vendors to contribute ideas and solutions that might otherwise remain untapped.

• Enhanced reputation: How you treat vendors reflects your character. Word travels fast, and respect builds credibility.

A Call to Self-Audit

I invite you to conduct a self-audit of your vendor interactions. Ask yourself:

• Do I treat vendors with the same respect I extend to clients, prospects, and team members?

• Do I engage with Caring, recognizing their humanity beyond their role?

• Do I build Connection by listening, mirroring, and finding common ground?

• Do I Collaborate, inviting vendors into the process of co-creation?

If the answer to any of these questions is “no,” consider how you might adjust your approach. The Persuasion Blueprint offers a framework for doing so. Caring, Connection, and Collaboration are not abstract ideals—they are practical distinctions that transform relationships.

Conclusion

Vendors are not invisible functionaries. They are human beings who play a vital role in our success. When we reduce them to their function, we diminish both their dignity and our own potential. When we engage with caring, connection, and collaboration, we elevate the relationship—and in doing so, we elevate ourselves.

The next time you interact with a vendor—whether it’s a server in a restaurant, a hotel staff member, a salesclerk, or a supplier, pause and ask yourself: Am I treating this person with the respect and attention they deserve? The answer to that question may well determine not only the quality of the service you receive, but also the quality of the leader you become.